Remember that old object lesson of taking one stick and breaking it, and then taking two or more sticks together and trying to break those, which becomes much more difficult. I have heard that lesson regarding scriptures as well as many other things, but I would like to relate it to all of our marital relationships.
I love the advice to always attempt to be on the same team, and although some of us may have differing strengths, both of us in a relationship have incredible value and import.
I believe it is important and interesting to look at the ways other relate to each other and through this I have learned a great deal. I have seen relationships that I feel are valuable, healthy, and worthy of emulation. Others have taught me behaviors that I do not want to have in my relationships.
With that said I believe there are wonderful teachings that can help correct misunderstandings. For example some believe that the man is more important in a marriage, and although most will deny this some of us act like that is true instead of following the truths of the gospel that I see teaching us that we all are valuable and that both man and women should work together side by side.
Sister Okazaki has taught that “Sometimes women think that their part of the partnership consists of being silent, sweet, and supportive under all circumstances. Well, I have trouble seeing the relationship between a doormat and a pair of muddy boots as a real partnership. Instead, I like to think of partnership as two hands, working together. There’s not much that one finger can do by itself. It can point or prod or poke. But to comfort or hold or lift, it takes all five. (That’s why Relief Society needs all the sisters, by the way!) And there’s virtually no end to the good that two hands, gripping the same burden, can do.”
-Chieko Okazaki, Disciples, p. 69