No Healthy Marriage Needs to Fear a Strong Woman or a Strong Man In It

 

“Sometimes we hear the message that our strength is not desirable or wanted. Sometimes women feel that they should defer to others—that their husbands’ opinions are more important than their own, that the spiritual living teacher in Relief Society must be more spiritual than they are, or that their needs and wants should be sacrificed to those of their children. Should we retreat to being passive or weak or inadequate because the idea of becoming strong frightens us or someone else? No healthy marriage needs to fear a strong woman or a strong man in it.”

-Chieko Okazaki, Sanctuary, p. 141

I once had a church leader who I strongly resonated with as he was an extremely loving and compassionate person. This leader was once talking about what it meant for the savior to be meek. He stated that as a younger person he didn’t understand this because he saw meekness as being synonymous with weakness, and would ask why we would worship someone who was weak. However as he learned more he began to believe that this meekness of the savior took nothing away from the strength that was also prevalent in the Savior.

I think we often get this mixed up in ourselves as well. We see ourselves as needing to be humble and thus feel held back. There are many women (and men) who have incredible strength and power who could contribute an incredible amount to the church and all of our lives, but feel as if they should not move forward because they are to be humble, meek, and nonintrusive. I feel that this is an important misunderstanding that all of us need to shed. I believe that all of us have access to incredible amounts of power, and that we need not be afraid of that. We need to stop being afraid strength and should instead seek to validate and support those around us to reach our potential instead of correlating and holding each other back.

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